FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

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FROM LEFT:
Bangle  // Alexander McQueen
Watch // Burton
Bangle // River Island
Bracelet // Cartier

It recently occurred to me that 80% of my wardrobe is in fact grey. Grey is my go-to colour. Grey is my black. I love anything in grey, it’s so versatile for summer and winter, goes with every other colour on the Pantone spectrum and looks fab on every item of clothing , accessories and shoes. I realised as I thumbed through my clothes and accessories that the only item I do not have in grey is a watch. Until now.

I much prefer big men’s watches to dainty women’s watches as with a lot of the accessories I wear. I found this grey watch from Burton, which isn’t even a shop I that I would nelly browse in, but my local Burton is part of a concession store with all Arcadia brands (Topshop, Miss Selfridge, Dorothy Perkins etc.) and I found myself wandering over to the accessories.

It’s fair to say that my life feels a whole lot more complete with the final touch of grey in my wardrobe bringing the grand total to fifty shades, although not that type of Grey.

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SHAPEWEAR FOR MEN?

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So yesterday, whilst I was being all cultured and intellectual, I was reading The Times and I came across an article on Funkybod;  shape-wear for men. When I first saw it I sniggered thinking “that is the most vain and ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen”; but then I looked down at my own padded bra and across the room to my optical illusion dress and my mind wondered to the millions of pairs of Spanx that are bought by women all over the world every year. Oh. I carried on reading with intrigue and realised that whilst the common notion from women is that the media over-sexualises us, we are our own worst enemies. We create the hype ourselves.

The craze for men wearing makeup, straightening their hair, using self tan and getting botox leaves most women (and other men) with the impression that such an individual “must be gay” or that he’s as vain as Kelly Brook’s Instagram page. But aren’t all these things women use on a regular basis? Some of which, women see as a necessity; an integral part of their daily life.

So why is it so different for men? We’re all programmed to believe that women are supposed to stay ageless, a size 8 and always effortless while men can pretty much do what they want (without becoming slobbish). Funkybod produces tops for men that are “designed to give the appearance and feel of muscle size and definition.” Now when I first saw the photo of the poor volunteer I definitely though that surely that’s just a serious case of false representation? And then I googled Spanx…

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… And padded bras…

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… And optical illusion dresses…

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Okay, who did I think I was? Besides the Spanx, I own every piece of body-sculpting, bust-boosting, leg-lengthening product available on the market. Why shouldn’t men be able to do the same?

The idea seems ridiculous, but why should women be able to deceive men of their looks and it not be allowed to be reciprocated? Having said all this, I’m not quite sure how I would feel if my (imaginary) boyfriend went around with foam-induced pecs and biceps. But each to his/her own.

www.funkybod.com

LONG LIVE MCQUEEN

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Today marks three years since the passing of legendary designer Lee Alexander Mcqueen. A pioneer of fashion, a genius with cut and a mastermind of creativity, there will never be another like Alexander McQueen. The brand lives after the brains and hands of the brand passed, but the spark is gone, the creative flame no longer flickering.

In his legacy, we remember a time when McQueen brought a side of fashion that no one else did; he brought desire, fear, enchantment, melancholy and endless amounts of innovative and phenomenal art.

LONG LIVE MCQUEEN.

DESIGNER WINTER ACCS

The way the weird and wonderful fashion industry works is that while the sky is thick and the ground is white in January, high-end websites and exclusive stores are already making you (or at least me) feel nauseous as they tempt us fashion bunnies with their shining array of wayyyy-too-expensive Spring/Summer collections. But hold up, I’t England. It’s snowing. The temperature is disgusting.

Much like my previous post on high street Winter accessories, here are my top designer picks for Winter accessories.

Burberry

Burberry

Diane Von Furstenberg

Diane Von Furstenberg

Emma Fielden

Emma Fielden

Maison Martin Margiela

Maison Martin Margiela

Marc by Marc Jacobs

Marc by Marc Jacobs

Alexander McQueen

Alexander McQueen

Prada

Prada

Rag & Bone

Rag & Bone

Sportmax

Sportmax